View Full Version : Guys:: What We Look For:
OK, since the revival of the Dream Guy thread I've received new inspiration for the Dream Girl thread (not to bash or anything though).
I'll start with re-posting what I felt were the most relevant/informational posts in the dearly departed thread.
Post #11
Submitted 11-22-2005, 09:30 AM
Here are some things that I may like:
Someone that would listen to me and talks as a friend.
Do not talk too loud or too much for nothing.
Just a little smaller than me.
Younger than me.
Could help me in my calling (complete me).
Gifted.
Pretty and dressing with good taste.
Able to cook better than me.
A part of me (I see myself in her).
Complicity.
The meaning of complicity was addressed by Philippe after some confusion on the word:
Well, what happened is that the word in french has 2 meanings but only one of them should be translated into complicity. The other one means "deep agreement". So we can uses the same word for "good" and "bad" agreement to do something.
In this context, it would means someone that would generally things and act like me in similar context without the necessity of a loud agreement.
Post #13
Submitted 11-22-2005, 10:29 AM
I don't quite know what I like to such a degree of specification - but I found it funny how many Philippe mentioned that I have already decided on. I'll start with those first and then add the others.
Able to cook better than me (not an easy thing to do, mind you).
Someone who can speak intelligently and is able to match my arguments and even prove me wrong on things.
She would not be unneccessarily giddy or boisterous (e.g. silly). She would be mature. When she speaks, she has something to say. Not to say I want a quite girl, I like extroverts. :thumbup:
She would be fun to be with and easily engage my introverted self into conversation. Her personality would be such that it loosens me up - instead of letting me keep to my default serious ways all the time.
Of course, if we're talking about a dream girl, she should be pretty. But whoever I marry is going to be pretty in my eyes, so it's all relative anyhow. :)
She would have a zest for God and a zest for life. And of course, she would be filled with the Holy Spirit.
Now I could go into details in the "pretty " category and what I consider pretty. But that's a little personal. I stop now.
*Please pay attention to the context here. These are ideal traits, not necessarily requirements.
Post #19
Submitted on 11-24-2005, 01:11 PM
Now that I've thought of it, my "dream girl" description was rather vague. It should be called my "ideal girl" - a step up from my "absolutely must have traits" list in the ME thread.
Now my dream girl... she would take to long to describe. :thumbup:
* http://yqnews.org/forums/showpost.php?p=3319&postcount=43 is the location of the post referred to in this post.
Post #20
Submitted 11-24-2005, 02:09 PM
*blessed pulls up chair and takes out the popcorn*
Go ahead bro, by the way i liked Phillipe comments on the dream girl
Post #21
Submitted 11-24-2005, 09:47 PM
I think my "dream girl" is a rather personal, subjective concept.
Personal, because if my future wife ever found it, she might feel inadequate - thinking that she doesn't measure up to my concept of the perfect women... not realizing that my concept of a perfect women would surely have changed once I fell in love with her.
Subjective, because my concept of what I like in a female is constantly changing as the number of interactions with varied girls increases. BTW, this is a good reason for not marrying too young - most of us at young ages are too capricious and fickle to really know what we want. Figure out what you can realistically expect from your mate and your marriage before you dive into a relationship.
Questions for Reflection:
What is the purpose of a mate? That is, besides fulfilling my physical and emotional wants, how would a mate make me more effective in my calling?
Do I need a mate? Am I called to be single?
Am I enjoying my singlehood while I have it?
What qualities should my mate possess? (i.e. Holy Ghost, prayer warrior, ladylike, treats others with respect, a gentleman... things that you feel he/she MUST have to even be considered...)
How would my mate complete me? (i.e. financial security, affirmation, providing an outlet to express the unexpressed, challenge you spiritually, etc)
Any other thoughts?
Post #22
Submitted 11-24-2005, 11:58 PM
I think my "dream girl" is a rather personal, subjective concept
Yes... and this is why I would essentially only says things that are generally accepted in such forum. Thus, I present only a part of my opinion.
What is the purpose of a mate? That is, besides fulfilling my physical and emotional wants, how would a mate make me more effective in my calling?Well, the sister should share my vision and want to be a part of it.
Do I need a mate? Am I called to be single?
Well, I believe that very few are called to be single.
Am I enjoying my singlehood while I have it?
Yes... but sometime it's a bit harder. Well, the best way to enjoy life is to consecrate it to the Lord.
What qualities should my mate possess? (i.e. Holy Ghost, prayer warrior, ladylike, treats others with respect, a gentleman... things that you feel he/she MUST have to even be considered...)
Sure there are some must... but I do not have any checklist.
How would my mate complete me? (i.e. financial security, affirmation, providing an outlet to express the unexpressed, challenge you spiritually, etc)
Together, we would make a team looking forward in the direction of God.
Post #29
Submitted 11-26-2005, 02:58 PM
I like to hear what guys expect from a girl. It is very downgrading to hear girls say things like they can get a guy just because the fact that they are a girl. To hear people talking about standards....it is just incredable, and appreciated. Keep your standards guys, everyone of you. When you come from hearing people talking or joking dirty, to hear standards it just wonderful.
I have two guys at the restaraunt where I work, Kurt and Jacob. Kurt I really don't care for at all, and this was an aquired feeling. He is just too friendly, and I have started giving him kinda the cold shoulder (as per mom's advice), but he still hasn't gotten the hint. He is engaged already, (met his fiancee, she is not exactly the perfect lady :rolleyes:) and he has made a comment to one of the other servers that I am "kinda cute". That really made me start disliking him, because if someone is already engaged, then he should have eyes only for his girl. When I am doing something, he comes right up to me, very close, or Jacob will say something, and I will reply kinda like, "ookkkaaay" and then Kurt will say something low to Jacob, and I think it is about me. I feel really uncomfortable around Kurt, and almost wish that I had a boyfriend, just to protect myself from him. He hasn't tried anything, but if he does, he will have my dad to reckon with, as well as Tomas, the owner and my boss, who sees my kinda like a daughter.
Jacob, on the other hand, isn't all that bad by himself, but I get really uncomfortable when he and Kurt are together, but he has already made comments like, "Thank you, love", or when I asked him if he needed anything else he replied "just your phone number", to which I promptly replied "that you need to take up with my dad". Part of me thinks that he is just joking around, but the other part kinda senses an underlying current, like a hidden agenda. (any thoughts or comments on that?) They are worldy men, and I don't think that they have any sort of values or morals, especially Kurt, who has this....atmosphere around him to where most of the people who work there really don't care for him. If I have to cause a scene, I will, but I really don't want to.
I believe that they really don't have a standard for the girls that they see. I like the fact that you guys are setting standards, and won't just take any girl that walks by just because she is a girl. I say good for you.
This is the point where the conversation went awry (and yes, I do find it ironic that I fleshed a 87 post thread down to essentially 9 posts) .
New thought to prime the pump:
I really admire a girl who is confident. There I said it. Anybody else got a load they need to get of their chest?
HotShot53
03-06-2006, 09:51 PM
I agree with all of your ideal traits, Joe.... though since off the top of my head I can think of at least 3 girls I know that fit them all, I may need to try to figure out some more...
BroTrevor
03-06-2006, 10:36 PM
Since I'm no longer looking...I thought maybe I'd share what I looked for and what impressed me about my wife.
I was actually NOT looking when SisTrev came around. She was just there, and we went on a date.
What struck me is that even tho she wasnt as outgoing as I thought I would like to see in a girl, she was a true Christian. She didn't dress immodestly or borderline. That wasn't an issue for her. Can you imagine being married to a girl that dressed this way? Can you imagine having to tell your wife "uhm, honey...you can't wear that...take that back to the store." And what if she got mad at you for saying that?
She also didn't trim her hair or wear makeup of any kind.
Ok, so wham...numero uno is taken care of, this girl loves the Lord.
After that...well, she wasn't really what I had in mind for a girl I would have been looking for, had I been looking. Another thing that helped alot...she called me first. Now, some are shocked at how untraditional this is...but, I just came out of a bad relationship a year or so before that, where I did all the work in the relationship, so the fact that she showed interest in me REALLY helped things along.
Seriously, how good does it make a guy feel when a girl shows she's interested? I'm not saying throw yourself at him, I can't stand it when a girl does that, but hey...be a friend ya know??
So, I guess after that the Lord just worked it all out.
Was she a perfect picture of my "ideal girl" back then? No.
Can I imagine anyone else I'd rather be with now? Absolutely not.
God knows just what we need. So be careful not to get in his way with preconcieved notions of what you think you need. Not saying you are doing that...just a friendly reminder.
HotShot53
03-06-2006, 10:59 PM
Lol, that's how I've been so far Bro. Trevor... basically the only real requirements I've had is that she loves the Lord and me ;) And I agree... call me lazy and untraditional, but I don't see what's wrong with the girl calling the guy every once in a while...
NeedGod
03-07-2006, 04:48 AM
whew, thats interesting. still, i am the most traditional girl there ever was. i find it hard to call a guy just to say hi. in truth, the only guy i call often, is my best friend because, well, because he is my best friend. and i call or text only three or four times a week. i find it hard to call anyone else. whew! i am sooo traditional. :peep: i envy girls who can call guys. i wouldnt know what to say. it would go something like
'uuuh, hi'
-hi-
'ummm, i just called to say hi'
-who is this?-
(this is the point where i would have hang up in a rush but this thing called caller id would have sold me out)
'umm, esther. anyhow, i didnt have much credit and i was just calling to say hi. so anyhow, nice day'
blessed
03-07-2006, 10:46 AM
Lol, that's how I've been so far Bro. Trevor... basically the only real requirements I've had is that she loves the Lord and me ;) And I agree... call me lazy and untraditional, but I don't see what's wrong with the girl calling the guy every once in a while...
I think that i am very untraditional in that aspect, i have no problem if I do eventually meet somebody in calling a guy, providing that he gave me his number. But some churches do not allow that, they say that is being to forward and unscriptual.
SisTrev
03-07-2006, 11:17 AM
Ok...so what Trevor failed to mention when he said i called him was that he wasn't home at the time. So i didn't get to talk to him. AND the only reason I did call him in the first place, (cause normally i would never have called first) was the I had gotten in a small "fender bender" that day (my very first and hopefully last) and I was very shook up. I just figured that calling Trevor would make me feel better. But alas...he wasn't home. But I had left a message so that is how he found out i called.
blessed
03-07-2006, 11:20 AM
Lol seems as though he forgot the most important part
FreeAtLast
03-07-2006, 11:43 AM
Ok...so what Trevor failed to mention when he said i called him was that he wasn't home at the time. So i didn't get to talk to him. AND the only reason I did call him in the first place, (cause normally i would never have called first) was the I had gotten in a small "fender bender" that day (my very first and hopefully last) and I was very shook up. I just figured that calling Trevor would make me feel better. But alas...he wasn't home. But I had left a message so that is how he found out i called.
what means fender bender?
and yeah, I am most probably old-fashioned. I would not phone a guy first. no problem phoning him after he phoned me though...
desertroses
03-07-2006, 11:57 AM
Lol. I am pretty traditional in that respect. I think the only time I would feel somewhat comfortable in calling a guy first is if I was not interested in him 'that way', but only as a friend. I am more nervous when I actually like the guy. So for him to make the first move, makes a world of difference and sets me at ease. Then I wouldn't be 'as' nervous after that.
FreeAtLast
03-07-2006, 12:20 PM
what means fender bender?
and yeah, I am most probably old-fashioned. I would not phone a guy first. no problem phoning him after he phoned me though...
--- I meant when I was interested in him.
besides this, no prob phoning any guy.
blessed
03-07-2006, 12:34 PM
Lol. I am pretty traditional in that respect. I think the only time I would feel somewhat comfortable in calling a guy first is if I was not interested in him 'that way', but only as a friend. I am more nervous when I actually like the guy. So for him to make the first move, makes a world of difference and sets me at ease. Then I wouldn't be 'as' nervous after that.
Does him giving you his number be counted as the first move or an actual call?
desertroses
03-07-2006, 12:43 PM
Does him giving you his number be counted as the first move or an actual call?
Giving me his number, I would consider that to be the first move on his part. Then I would call.
HotShot53
03-07-2006, 04:43 PM
what means fender bender?
A fender-bender is a minor car accident, when you just bend or scratch your fender (or something small like that).
And what I was meaning in my post was the girl calling after the guy made the first move... I chat with one girl who wouldn't call the guy even though he calls her basically every day. Lol, if any girl started calling me first, my mom and sister would be warning me away from her so quick...
blessed
03-07-2006, 04:46 PM
The funny thing is i have no problem talking with someone over the phone, but in person that's another story... i would usually have very little to say
HotShot53
03-07-2006, 05:03 PM
Lol, I'm almost the opposite... I never talk on the phone, cause I have nothing to say... and although I'm not too much better in person, at least I can usually keep the conversation going with someone else who is interested in keeping it going.
desertroses
03-07-2006, 06:13 PM
Isn't it the worst thing, when the other person doesn't keep it going? It's so frustrating. It's really annoying too when all the person says is one-liners, merely to answer your questions.
I don't think I'm that good over the phone, unless the person really gets me going on a topic. In person, it's better, but I agree, once the other person helps to keep the conversation going, it's much more relaxed.
Hotshots, the girl that you chat with, perhaps she's not interested in the guy that calls her all the time, or is she just shy?
BroTrevor
03-07-2006, 06:30 PM
In retrospect I feel to say the following..
I'm in no way advocating girls should call up the guys, especially if they hardly know each other and such.
I just think it may be helpful to some guys to at least know somehow that the girl isn't going to play a cat and mouse game. I appreciated knowing that she was interested in talking to me.
Again, I wasn't looking for a girl to throw herself at me and ask ME to marry HER... but I appreciated knowing she was interested in my company.
Perhaps something as simple as if the guy calls you once, and you chat, I recommend the next time he calls, and if you enjoyed the conversation, to let him know..."hey, really enjoyed chatting last time you called...it was fun"
That would probably go a long way for any guy who is struggling with confidence...and I think many are.
HotShot53
03-07-2006, 06:36 PM
Hotshots, the girl that you chat with, perhaps she's not interested in the guy that calls her all the time, or is she just shy?
No, she's interested in him, and she's not shy.... she just doesn't think it proper for her to be calling.
... I chat with one girl who wouldn't call the guy even though he calls her basically every day...
Hmmmmm, I wonder how the guy feels about that?
HotShot53
03-07-2006, 11:28 PM
Hmmmmm, I wonder how the guy feels about that?
I don't know, since the guy doesn't go online I don't know him...
How would you feel if that were your situation?
NeedGod
03-08-2006, 03:55 AM
if i were in the girls situation, i think i might have had no problem calling the guy, especially if he calls everyday. but i would only call once every loooong while like once a fortnight. this is mostly because i never have any money in my phone though :012: so i wouldnt have a way to call.*snicker*
BroTrevor
03-08-2006, 10:25 AM
I don't know, since the guy doesn't go online I don't know him...
How would you feel if that were your situation?
This reminds me of a situation I had once.
I would call this girl I had a big crush on every so often and chat "as friends" of course. She was dating a guy from another state at the time. We talked once about another guy that was calling a friend of mine, and she wondered if he liked her. I was like, "Of course he does! Guys don't just call girls all the time to just to talk about the weather...he's gotta like her". Then she pipes up..."but isn't that what we're doing? What if my boyfriend thinks the same about you?"
WHAM! Open mouth, insert foot. Boy did I not think about that one.
In short, the call was over pretty quick after that...and I didn't call much anymore.
Of course, I don't think that about all guys calling girls now...but back then I was 15ish. I think there are some guys who are capable of just being friends and not thinking of anything more. I know there were a couple girls I was good friends to, whom I didn't care to date. (and certainly not because they weren't pretty...just personality)
I'll share something with you all.
I used to call a girl frequently. I'm not saying I was interested, but hey, we were friends and I enjoyed talking to her. I was always the one making the phone calls and it began to get depressing. I was putting all this effort into this friendship and it seemed unrequitted. Sure, she seemed to enjoy the conversations - - but the fact that she never made the effort to touch base really hurt.
Finally I stopped calling for awhile and she IMed me online and asked why she hadn't heard from me. I threw it back at her by saying "hey, you never call either." Her response? "Well, that's different."
To this day I'm still not sure what was different about it, perhaps she wasn't supposed to or didn't feel comfortable with calling guys.
So, based on that experience, I not only think that if a guy is calling a girl to be friends or something more even, she should be decent enough to either return his calls or tell him "Hey, I'm not interested in being friends and I'm not interested in anything more either."
People talk about how the gentleman should make his intent clear when pursuing a girl - letting her know whether he's interested in friendship or more than that. I believe the girls have this same duty, but many seem to be oblvious to it.
redeemed_lizzi
03-08-2006, 12:20 PM
I'll share something with you all.
I believe the girls have this same duty, but many seem to be oblvious to it.
I agree. Girls do have a duty to be straightforward with guys, otherwise it's just unfair. I try and be open in all my friendships, as I have learned the hard and painful way what happens when things are left unsaid, or said, or said at the wrong time to the wrong people. I like people to know exactly where they stand with me and I would hope that if I really liked a guy he would know exactly how I felt. That is, without being too forward or blatantly obvious.
BroTrevor
03-08-2006, 12:32 PM
I'll share something with you all.
I used to call a girl frequently. I'm not saying I was interested, but hey, we were friends and I enjoyed talking to her. I was always the one making the phone calls and it began to get depressing. I was putting all this effort into this friendship and it seemed unrequitted. Sure, she seemed to enjoy the conversations - - but the fact that she never made the effort to touch base really hurt.
Finally I stopped calling for awhile and she IMed me online and asked why she hadn't heard from me. I threw it back at her by saying "hey, you never call either." Her response? "Well, that's different."
To this day I'm still not sure what was different about it, perhaps she wasn't supposed to or didn't feel comfortable with calling guys.
So, based on that experience, I not only think that if a guy is calling a girl to be friends or something more even, she should be decent enough to either return his calls or tell him "Hey, I'm not interested in being friends and I'm not interested in anything more either."
People talk about how the gentleman should make his intent clear when pursuing a girl - letting her know whether he's interested in friendship or more than that. I believe the girls have this same duty, but many seem to be oblvious to it.
This was exactly my point in a previous post. If the girl likes the company to, but feels that it is innappropriate for her to call, she should AT LEAST let the guy know that she's enjoying his calls.
I've been in the same situation JoeC was in, It's no fun being the one to make everything happen...sometimes you want to know they are thinking of you too, and they should show that to you as well.
desertroses
03-08-2006, 01:38 PM
I agree. Girls do have a duty to be straightforward with guys, otherwise it's just unfair. I try and be open in all my friendships, as I have learned the hard and painful way what happens when things are left unsaid, or said, or said at the wrong time to the wrong people. I like people to know exactly where they stand with me and I would hope that if I really liked a guy he would know exactly how I felt. That is, without being too forward or blatantly obvious.
I completely agree! The best kind of friendships between guys and girls is when they know where the other stands...if not, usually hurt feelings are the result one way or another. I think if a girl does not want to keep up a friendship with a guy that calls her all the time, she does have a duty to tell him how she really feels, otherwise, she's just leading him on and that's not fair for the guy (who may really like her). I know how it feels to do all the work and it is not fun! So, both the guy and girl should not lead eachother on.
Hotshots, about the girl you chat with, if I were her...(since she does not think it polite to call the guy), I would let the guy know that I like him, otherwise he may begin to think that she's not interested and may stop calling altogether.
I just wanna say that I don't believe in male-female friendship. Maybe that is possible with a guy that is Christian but even than, I think that there is always some sort of an attraction that is not just friendly attraction (if you know what I mean)... With a friend in tha world it is definetly not possible, but I also doubt that a Christian guy and a Christian girl can be ˝just friends˝. And by friends I mean someone that knows you well and with whom you talk about relatively intimate subjects like for example fears, problems of personal matter, stuff like that... A friend is someone you can talk to when you are down and a guy can't comfort you on a friend to a friend basis. Anyway that's my opinion...
I don't know whether that fits the subject or not :misli: .
If not, silly me :y10:
desertroses
03-08-2006, 04:23 PM
In my experience I have had a few guy friends from school that aren't in the Message, and every time after a while, they always wanted something more than just friendship... so yes, there is a small danger there. It depends though, because you can tell them you just want to be friends. But it really does depend on the guy too. Some of them will be offended by this, and others are fine with it...so I think that we can't generalize.
blessed
03-08-2006, 04:32 PM
I understand ancy's point but there is a balance with everything, i have friends in the message and out, and they know their limit.If i feel uncomfortable in any way i am sure i will let them know, the time of day.
I just wanna say that I don't believe in male-female friendship. Maybe that is possible with a guy that is Christian but even than, I think that there is always some sort of an attraction that is not just friendly attraction (if you know what I mean)... With a friend in tha world it is definitely not possible, but I also doubt that a Christian guy and a Christian girl can be ˝just friends˝. And by friends I mean someone that knows you well and with whom you talk about relatively intimate subjects like for example fears, problems of personal matter, stuff like that... A friend is someone you can talk to when you are down and a guy can't comfort you on a friend to a friend basis. Anyway that's my opinion...
I don't know whether that fits the subject or not :misli: .
If not, silly me :y10:
I used to believe that a male-female friendship could not become intimate (see this blog post (http://jcspeaks.blogspot.com/2004/11/jc-speaks-friendships.html)for what I mean by intimate) w/o one or the other friend entertaining emotions for the other.. It seemed to me that one couldn't share that much of oneself and receive that much of another without at least one or the other becoming attached. I've since revised this to saying that though not impossible, it is extremely unlikely and very hard. I only changed my perspective after speaking to some adults who claim to have pulled it off in their youth (my pastor's wife being one of them). Still, I'd have to agree with you that it becomes a very tricky situation.
BroTrevor
03-08-2006, 10:27 PM
Some of us are just naturally friendly people. I think I can have relationships with others without being attached. (good thing since I'm married) That being said, to avoid things looking bad, I don't really "prioritize" those relationships because of my position as a husband.
Decorum and all that ya know.
However, I think that I have had some perfectly good and deep friendships with girls. But again, maybe it's easier for me being quite a people person...
HotShot53
03-08-2006, 11:16 PM
Hotshots, about the girl you chat with, if I were her...(since she does not think it polite to call the guy), I would let the guy know that I like him, otherwise he may begin to think that she's not interested and may stop calling altogether.
Lol, no worries there, I'm sure they both know where they stand with each other ;)
As far as girl-guy "just friends" goes, I think it's possible to be "close friends" (per Joe's deffinition), though being "intimate friends" when you are nothing more than friends would seem to be dangerous...
AgapZoe
03-09-2006, 05:49 AM
Lol, no worries there, I'm sure they both know where they stand with each other ;)
As far as girl-guy "just friends" goes, I think it's possible to be "close friends" (per Joe's deffinition), though being "intimate friends" when you are nothing more than friends would seem to be dangerous...
-mmmh? just musing over this topic and what hotshot has just said....(see above!) :think:
desertroses
03-10-2006, 05:39 PM
Lol. Please clarify...
HotShot53
03-10-2006, 10:55 PM
If you read Joe's definition of those terms in his blog (linked in his post), you would understand what I am meaning, I hope...
desertroses
03-11-2006, 12:29 AM
lol, I guess that came out wrong, I meant 'please clarify (Halima)'....I got what you meant Hotshots.
HotShot53
03-11-2006, 12:53 AM
lol, ok. I think Halima was meaning she didn't get what I said, so I thought you might not have either...
AgapZoe
03-11-2006, 10:23 AM
lol, ok. I think Halima was meaning she didn't get what I said, so I thought you might not have either...
heeeey, what i meant is exactly what i posted. i was just musing over the topic...and well, i simply didn't have something to contribute on it. was just thinking over what you guys had discussed on......and now i think i understand...will come back and contribute later...........
desertroses
03-12-2006, 08:41 PM
Lol. Ok, so I guess everything is clarified now, right Hotshots?...
NeedGod
03-13-2006, 06:34 AM
heeeey, what i meant is exactly what i posted. i was just musing over the topic...and well, i simply didn't have something to contribute on it. was just thinking over what you guys had discussed on......and now i think i understand...will come back and contribute later...........
umm, if you look at the thread posts you will realize posting for the sake of posting just to get post numbers up is frowned upon here.seems its a family problem cuz. you gotta avoid it!
BroTrevor
03-13-2006, 05:32 PM
:D.
I'm trying to figure out the subliminal message behind this one...
HotShot53
03-14-2006, 12:40 AM
Joe was meaning he liked what namwacha said, that she got what we tried to tell her ;)
Lol, looks like the confusion in the thread started again...
NeedGod
03-14-2006, 01:10 AM
i got it alright hotshot. and i am trying hard not to post such posts any more, and my post numbers havent decreased, they just added value, i think...i must admit it feels better too. ther, i started sounding like a reformed drunk(which i am by the way.lol).
aha, confusion in threads, so whats new?
HotShot53
03-14-2006, 01:13 AM
And you are doing a good job at it, namwacha :)
NeedGod
03-14-2006, 01:22 AM
gee thanks, now youve gone and made my day! :yay: and it will only get better the deeper i get into Christ. glory hallelujah, He is the most wonderful ever, my Jesus!
Since I'm no longer looking...I thought maybe I'd share what I looked for and what impressed me about my wife.
I was actually NOT looking when SisTrev came around. She was just there, and we went on a date.
What struck me is that even tho she wasnt as outgoing as I thought I would like to see in a girl, she was a true Christian. She didn't dress immodestly or borderline. That wasn't an issue for her. Can you imagine being married to a girl that dressed this way? Can you imagine having to tell your wife "uhm, honey...you can't wear that...take that back to the store." And what if she got mad at you for saying that?
She also didn't trim her hair or wear makeup of any kind.
Ok, so wham...numero uno is taken care of, this girl loves the Lord.
After that...well, she wasn't really what I had in mind for a girl I would have been looking for, had I been looking. Another thing that helped alot...she called me first. Now, some are shocked at how untraditional this is...but, I just came out of a bad relationship a year or so before that, where I did all the work in the relationship, so the fact that she showed interest in me REALLY helped things along.
Seriously, how good does it make a guy feel when a girl shows she's interested? I'm not saying throw yourself at him, I can't stand it when a girl does that, but hey...be a friend ya know??
So, I guess after that the Lord just worked it all out.
Was she a perfect picture of my "ideal girl" back then? No.
Can I imagine anyone else I'd rather be with now? Absolutely not.
God knows just what we need. So be careful not to get in his way with preconcieved notions of what you think you need. Not saying you are doing that...just a friendly reminder.
Awwwwwwww...
:love:
redeemed
04-25-2006, 01:15 PM
how sweet!:) Bro Trevor! Even though i am a girl i can see how...uh not fun it would be for a guy to have to tell his wife "take that back."
AgapZoe
04-25-2006, 01:36 PM
Some deep words here from bro T,huh? sweet indeed!
Sarah,so you got xanga too? nice........
God bless you.
JMC_785
04-25-2006, 09:25 PM
and just think, it all started out as a thread on what we guys looked for in a girl... :misli: :D Hmmm, what's that you say? Oh what do I look for in a girl? :D Oh well let's see.....
She has to have dark brown hair and slate blue/grey eyes. Be a little shorter than me by just a little. Thin and lithe are optimal, and the more outgoing the better. She's going to be intelligent and subversive, underhanded and sneakily mean, just like me...:yay: She will be funny, sweet, smart, have lots of common sense, be cruel to her little brother, torturous to her parents...(hey, they have to WANT to give her away here...) uhm, more on this a little later as more comes to mind....
BTW, I've already met my dream companion. :yay:
Heeey! That sounds a lot like some one I know!
And you are doing a good job at it, namwacha :)
Indeed.....
NeedGod
04-26-2006, 01:19 AM
be cruel to her little brother, torturous to her parents...(hey, they have to WANT to give her away here...) uhm, more on this a little later as more comes to mind....
hehehe, that was funny! who is this. i want to know! :bouncie:do tell!
BroTrevor
04-26-2006, 12:08 PM
intelligent and subversive, underhanded and sneakily mean
be cruel to her little brother, torturous to her parents...
<chuckle>
Those 2 give it away entirely...
blessed
04-26-2006, 02:46 PM
Hmmmm.. How old is JMG??
JMC_785
04-26-2006, 04:40 PM
According to his profile, he is 19.
Hmmmm.. How old is JMG??
I am 19, I do not turn 20 till next year. :y10: :yay: :)
JMC_785
04-26-2006, 05:34 PM
Yeah, but you only have that much time till you experience the overwhelming change between being a teenager and no longer being a teenager. SCARY!!!:drowning:
Sarah,so you got xanga too? nice........
God bless you.
Yup! :yay:
Do you have xanga as well???
Here's mine at the bottom...
HotShot53
04-26-2006, 10:42 PM
I am 19, I do not turn 20 till next year. :y10: :yay: :)
A warning... you are over the first hill, and starting to get old at 20 :( (has anyone heard my theory about their being 3 hills in life?)
redeemed
04-27-2006, 12:39 AM
no do tell about your theory!:)
HotShot53
04-27-2006, 12:56 AM
no do tell about your theory!:)
Lol, ok, since I was asked ;)
Basically, it takes 20 years to get to the top or bottom of a hill.... so at 20 you are at the top of the world (and doesn't all 20 year-old's know that? ;)), then at 40 you are at the bottom of the hill (mid-life crisis time), then at 60 you are back to the top (retirement :)), 80 is bottom again (getting old....), then at 100 on top for the final time (you can get in the news just for turning 100 ;))
redeemed
04-27-2006, 01:00 AM
lol that's pretty good! where'd you come up with that??
HotShot53
04-27-2006, 01:14 AM
I needed a theory to support me saying that past 20 was over the hill..... so that's what I came up with, and it all actually makes sense ;)
AgapZoe
04-27-2006, 06:04 AM
-Hmmm,sounds true........Past 20 is over the hill!
But then,when do you come to a plateau,and when do you start going down the hill? ;) - Just wondering!
BroTrevor
04-27-2006, 11:32 AM
Lol, ok, since I was asked ;)
Basically, it takes 20 years to get to the top or bottom of a hill.... so at 20 you are at the top of the world (and doesn't all 20 year-old's know that? ;)), then at 40 you are at the bottom of the hill (mid-life crisis time), then at 60 you are back to the top (retirement :)), 80 is bottom again (getting old....), then at 100 on top for the final time (you can get in the news just for turning 100 ;))
That's hilarious...
joris
04-27-2006, 11:58 AM
Lol, ok, since I was asked ;)
Basically, it takes 20 years to get to the top or bottom of a hill.... so at 20 you are at the top of the world (and doesn't all 20 year-old's know that? ;)), then at 40 you are at the bottom of the hill (mid-life crisis time), then at 60 you are back to the top (retirement :)), 80 is bottom again (getting old....), then at 100 on top for the final time (you can get in the news just for turning 100 ;))
weird; I was at the bottom when I was around 20:confused:
redeemed
04-27-2006, 01:09 PM
I needed a theory to support me saying that past 20 was over the hill..... so that's what I came up with, and it all actually makes sense ;)
alrighty then! i guess that makes sense!
jordancpeterson
05-02-2006, 12:11 AM
To answer the original question. ‘If’ (and it’s a pretty big ‘if’) I ever get married she better know how to cook (from scratch)! After the latest trip I hate restaurants! (Or at least she better no mind me in the kitchen.)
for me the most important things would be:
a love of the Lord and believes the true revealed Word for this hour
somebody who has a good sense of humour (ie finds me funny)
someone who is very caring
somebody who can iron a good shirt!of all domestic duties i dislike ironing the most, cooking is good fun, washing clothes isnt hard (just put it in the machine and press a few buttons), washing the dishes is easy enuff (put it in the dishwasher), cleaning is something i really enjoy doing, but ironing is not fun, so boring!
looks aren't so important, a friend once told me "the more you like someone the better looking they are". i think if you truely love someone they could look like a gorilla that just ran into a brickwall and they'd still be the most beautiful person in the world in your eyes.
blessed
05-02-2006, 12:55 PM
i think if you truely love someone they could look like a gorilla that just ran into a brickwall and they'd still be the most beautiful person in the world in your eyes.
lol.......
I dislike ironing.
BroTrevor
05-02-2006, 05:33 PM
somebody who can iron a good shirt!
at least he's honest. Lord willing one day a fine young lady will take pity on your wrinkled state and decide to be the one to keep your shirts ironed for you.
redeemed
05-02-2006, 06:31 PM
To answer the original question. ‘If’ (and it’s a pretty big ‘if’) I ever get married she better know how to cook (from scratch)! After the latest trip I hate restaurants! (Or at least she better no mind me in the kitchen.)
lol Jordan, why do you hate restaurants so much??
i agree with you jezz i don't like ironing either!:ng_thumbd
HotShot53
05-03-2006, 12:37 AM
somebody who can iron a good shirt!
Just buy clothes that don't need ironing ;) None of my stuff needs ironing, which is a good thing, cause it'd never get done ;)
To answer the original question. ‘If’ (and it’s a pretty big ‘if’) I ever get married she better know how to cook (from scratch)! After the latest trip I hate restaurants! (Or at least she better no mind me in the kitchen.)
Lol, from the way you were chatting the other day, it's not quite so big an if ;) And he doesn't like restaurants anymore, cause he ate at them every day for a couple weeks while on a cross country trip.
NeedGod
05-03-2006, 07:57 AM
whew! whats with guys and ironing?
i dont like or dislike it. its like.....housework, it has to get done!
what i dislike is utensil work,
but then, like all other types of housework, it has to get done!
azurity
05-03-2006, 08:05 AM
I used to hate ironing. I never did it. My reasoning was... wash it, dry it, put it on under a jacket for a few hours, and no one will know the difference!
But I've since learnt, that my uniform collars get all wrinkly if you don't iron them for a year or 2. And at $100 a shirt... I need to look after them.
I hate ironing guys shirts, tho. They take forever, and as soon as you think you're done... you find another wrinkle.
I'm going to have to be awfully in love with a guy to want to iron his shirts (people say you usually are when you get married. I have no personal experience to prove this right or wrong.) Unless of course, he can do it himself. :D
NeedGod
05-03-2006, 08:10 AM
oh, you would.have you read the article in Only believe about sis. branham and how she hated ironing but how she did it all the time. lemme find it and i will post the link on here. i think Love makes us do the strangest of things. see how the love of God can change you into a whole new being! just love! whew! thats a strong thing, love is
http://www.onlybelieve.com/PDF/Lords_supper.pdf
found it, read the article on women's work
azurity
05-03-2006, 08:23 AM
I read that quite some time ago. I should go back and read it again.
It is true, love makes you do strange things. Like iron, and cook and clean all day long. I am told that when I fall in love with someone, I will actually want to do these things. (No wonder I'm still single!! :D)
NeedGod
05-03-2006, 08:29 AM
oh, you just wait, it will all come flooding in to you. i love my dad so much(he is my favoritest)and i usually feel like doing everything for him. now, imagine the guy who i will love so much i will even want to leave my father and mother for! whew! thats rich!
there is this certain someone i know, i usually feel like doing all these and more for him coz i like him sooooooooooooo much
*smiling smugly*
azurity
05-03-2006, 08:39 AM
I guess it's different when you actually know the guy.
Right now, the thought of ironing some strange man's shirts isn't very appealing.
But maybe one day... when I get to where you're at, I'll understand.
I'm so happy for you girl. :)
NeedGod
05-04-2006, 02:04 AM
no, i dont know the guy, not for sure. i am still reading the Word and praying. of course a part of me hopes it will be him, and that same part will be torn apart if it isnt and he finds someone else. but the most important part just wants to look to God and say, Thy will be done, whatever it be.
still, if you read the article about sis branham, you will see how true all these is. and if you look at how lives change when God touches them(and He is the author of Love after all, isnt He), you will see. why, look at what Adam did for love. He saved Eve even if He knew he would die for it. Look at what Jesus did for love, He died for us.
whew! my dearest sis, if love can do this, it can make you iron those shirts so hard you will look back after 50 years of blissful(OH YEAH!) shirt ironing and wonder, who is this ironing this shirts!
jtucker
05-04-2006, 04:47 AM
Mary said unto the Angel , be it unto me according to thy will! isnt' that exciting, she's laying her life done once again for Christ. she was already righteous among women by serving the lord not with her own ideaologies but with the Word of God in her mouth and on her heart. God Bless you sis Esther
NeedGod
05-04-2006, 04:59 AM
oh my, an when we leave it to His will, look what happens. just looking at Mary, i want to dance and sing. She gave herself so completely to His will such that she bore the Savior
sneezy503
08-15-2006, 03:00 AM
well how about this wut if someone else gave u his number but he gave someone his picture whn he knw u were gona get it and u didnt ask for it? Wuts that mean?:think:
sneezy503
08-15-2006, 03:11 AM
After reading most of this thread I've come to find out all I can say is Romans 8:28 thats a perfect verse for this thread it is amazing wut love can make u do and make u not do like if u love osmeone u wont hurt them and if u love someone u will do nehting to keep them from harm:) Praise God everyone he died for us becuz HE LOVED AND LOVES US:):D
God'schild
08-16-2006, 12:14 AM
Lol, ok, since I was asked ;)
Basically, it takes 20 years to get to the top or bottom of a hill.... so at 20 you are at the top of the world (and doesn't all 20 year-old's know that? ;)), then at 40 you are at the bottom of the hill (mid-life crisis time), then at 60 you are back to the top (retirement :)), 80 is bottom again (getting old....), then at 100 on top for the final time (you can get in the news just for turning 100 ;))
umm i think the theory goes like this
your at the top of the hill at 25 and then start going down the hill and by the time you reach 50 your at the bottom of the hill and they you start climbing another hill and by the time you reach 75 your at the top of the second hill. you start going down then and by the time you reach 100 your at the bottom.
my theory makes better sence then yours does Hotshot.
Why does your's make better sense? He at least gave reasons for his theory.
redeemed
08-16-2006, 05:43 PM
lol, i have to agree with joe, hotshots does make more sense
collegegirl
08-16-2006, 09:29 PM
well how about this wut if someone else gave u his number but he gave someone his picture whn he knw u were gona get it and u didnt ask for it? Wuts that mean?:think:
Depends on the person, and the circumstances. Seeing as how you are only 14, I wouldn't read too much into it.
Wow, I remember thinking about love when I was 14, but the more I see of it, the more that I realize that it has to be based on more than just emotions.
vBulletin v3.5.3, Copyright ©2000-2012, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.