Help Us Guys Out :{} [Archive] - Youth Quake Forums

Rogmahall

11-18-2006, 01:27 PM

HotShot53

11-18-2006, 03:53 PM

(moved to the guy/girl section... was more appropriate)

joris

11-18-2006, 04:30 PM

In this crazy world of everything bein backwards upsidedown, how do we know if you girls like us or 'like us'.I still feel like why would girls wait on guys to make a step I don't want to make that step

joris

11-18-2006, 04:31 PM

on second thought, that's probably just their reason, and act as if it's "biblical" as they don't want to have to make a step :ng_thumbd ;)

AlanaH

11-18-2006, 08:01 PM

Most girls don't want to make the first step. And trust me, if the girl wants to make the first step and try to really flirt and all that, if I was a guy, I would run the other direction.

HotShot53

11-18-2006, 09:33 PM

Most girls don't want to make the first step. And trust me, if the girl wants to make the first step and try to really flirt and all that, if I was a guy, I would run the other direction.

what happens, though, if the girl likes a guy, and even though she doesn't try to make the first step, she still gives off signals?

Skirty

11-18-2006, 10:03 PM

what happens, though, if the girl likes a guy, and even though she doesn't try to make the first step, she still gives off signals?
I don't think there is anything wrong with that. It's when a girl, or a guy for that matter, starts getting all touchy-feely or flakey about things that you want to look out. Simply because that is a very good indication of their maturity and spiritual levels.

As girls, I don't think it is our place to make the 'big move', lol, as in actually asking out or anything like that. I don't, however, think that we should just sit back and wait for some guy to read our minds and have to hope we're feeling the same.

Obviously, prayer, prayer and some more prayer is the first step, but in my opinion there is nothing wrong with giving indications. Just be careful that you're not giving off the wrong kind or to the wrong people.

Did that make any sense at all? I'm not sure :D

Babyruth

11-19-2006, 12:47 AM

That made sense. Good points.

HotShot53

11-19-2006, 04:22 PM

Sorry if my question interrupted the thread... I don't think anyone has answered the original question of what those signals are, though ;)

leahmb

11-20-2006, 01:07 PM

Here are a few I can think of. The list is not all, but also it doesn't mean just because a girl does one of these that she is interested.

-Starts talking to the guy
-Keeps looking at
-Tries to be friends with the family/friends
-Talks about them
-Inquires about them
-Follows them
-"Happens" to be where they are
-"Stalks" them online
-Laughs loudly when they are around
-Pretend to be all happy and chipper when they are around

More to come I'm sure....

HotShot53

11-20-2006, 02:20 PM

just the few signals I've noticed girls have seemed to use with me...

-jealousy over you meeting/talking with other girls
-wanting to chat online/talk on the phone with you as much as possible
-copying what you do/like

blessed

11-20-2006, 04:28 PM

Or in my case totally avoiding you ... :D

JoeC

11-20-2006, 05:41 PM

That's how you tell him you like him? :misli:

So I wasn't the cute one after all? :confused:

JoeC

11-20-2006, 06:08 PM

Babyruth

11-20-2006, 07:01 PM

leahmb

11-20-2006, 07:13 PM

I'm not saying that's what I do. Maybe I've been guilty of a few, but I have friends who have performed many of these and have observed many of these in countless situations.

How ostentatious.

Hm...don't know how to respond to that. I looked it up and get the meaning, but just not the context.

Babyruth

11-20-2006, 07:16 PM

I'm not saying that's what I do. Maybe I've been guilty of a few, but I have friends who have performed many of these and have observed many of these in countless situations.
I know you don't. I was meaning others... :D It's quite funny.

HotShot53

11-20-2006, 08:05 PM

That's how you tell him you like him? :misli:

So I wasn't the cute one after all? :confused:

Lol, she was referring to the generic "you", not me, as I'm sure you well know ;) (Well, I hope you do, anyway... though to be honest, I haven't seen blessed on at all lately...)

marichino_freedom

11-20-2006, 08:18 PM

Most girls don't want to make the first step. And trust me, if the girl wants to make the first step and try to really flirt and all that, if I was a guy, I would run the other direction.

i am guilty of that.....but i am not scary! i hope.......and that was over three years ago.....

blessed

11-21-2006, 01:16 PM

That's how you tell him you like him? :misli:

So I wasn't the cute one after all? :confused:

ummm.... won't bite that bait.I was not referring to hotshot... it was just a general statement. That's probably why Im still single. :D

joris

11-21-2006, 03:42 PM

Or in my case totally avoiding you ... :Dhmm maybe that's actually really smart... though sometimes you're out of luck there, it's not always easy to avoid someone

marichino_freedom

11-21-2006, 04:03 PM

well, you could always throw a paper bag over your head and not speak to anyone!!!! talk about avoiding people! :D

blessed

11-21-2006, 04:05 PM

lol.... mary!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Im sure everyone will notice you then .... you'll be known as the paper bag girl :D

marichino_freedom

11-21-2006, 06:59 PM

heehee....well, I would run from me if i saw me in a paper bag!

joris

11-21-2006, 07:13 PM

heehee....well, I would run from me if i saw me in a paper bag!heh... that'd be funny, seeing you running all wild all the time :y10::harhar1:
wait, how would you see you with a paper bag on you? :y10:

marichino_freedom

11-21-2006, 08:05 PM

ahhhh.....foiled again! :chris:

JoeC

11-21-2006, 11:50 PM

eyeholes :D

JoeC

11-21-2006, 11:53 PM

ummm.... won't bite that bait.I was not referring to hotshot... it was just a general statement. That's probably why Im still single. :D

You did not answer my second question. :mad:

HotShot53

11-22-2006, 12:07 AM

You did not answer my second question. :mad:

Lol, did you actually expect her to? I'm afraid we will probably never know that answer :(

blessed

11-22-2006, 10:17 AM

You did not answer my second question. :mad:
Would u give me a green if i answered it ? :D

marichino_freedom

11-22-2006, 11:13 AM

Its a trap!!!!!!!!!! dont be fooled!!!!!! :D

Nate

11-22-2006, 12:16 PM

Help us guys out.
In this crazy world of everything bein backwards upsidedown, how do we know if you girls like us or 'like us'.
Yeeeeeears ago we guys and gals didn't cutup mingle like we do now.
The signals are so mixed.
Which kindnesses, pokes, smiles, jests, are just friendlies
and which ones mean 'Im interested'?

Don't take this the wrong way, but you're not going to find out on the internet.

HotShot53

11-22-2006, 01:56 PM

Don't take this the wrong way, but you're not going to find out on the internet.

Says who? Lots of people nowadays meet and talk online, and then get engaged... e.g. Mark & Hope, Samurai & Hui... And I think we pretty much answered his question about as well as anyone could in person...

Babyruth

11-22-2006, 03:01 PM

Don't take this the wrong way, but you're not going to find out on the internet.
I have to say I agree.

Nate

11-23-2006, 04:23 AM

Says who? Lots of people nowadays meet and talk online, and then get engaged... e.g. Mark & Hope, Samurai & Hui... And I think we pretty much answered his question about as well as anyone could in person...

It's likely they were able to figure out what the signs were from experience, not something they got from the "sage advice" of peers.

HotShot53

11-23-2006, 02:35 PM

It's likely they were able to figure out what the signs were from experience, not something they got from the "sage advice" of peers.

True, experience is always the best teacher... but when you don't have any experience, peers who do is better than nothing ;)

Unregistered

11-23-2006, 09:50 PM

Don't take this the wrong way, but you're not going to find out on the internet.

i happened to agree!!!
you really don't know what the person is like by just talking to them on the internet, you only find out what they are like when you meet them in person.

Chelles

11-26-2006, 12:25 AM

I'm new here and am doing a jumpin/jumpout on the girls thread.

Help us guys out.

In this crazy world of everything bein backwards upsidedown, how do we know if you girls like us or 'like us'.

Yeeeeeears ago we guys and gals didn't cutup mingle like we do now.

The signals are so mixed.

Which kindnesses, pokes, smiles, jests, are just friendlies
and which ones mean 'Im interested'?

Thank you for allowing me steppin in.

You know....it's never cut and dry...it varies from girl to girl. Some will smile bigger, brighter, and laugh more in your presence....some however won't even look your direction....much less pay any attention to you.

In my little humble opinion...I think the best way to read her is watch her and take this into consideration....

Does she treat you like she treats every other guy? Does she run from all guys? Does she sit one-on-one with lots of guys and giggle?

If she's talking and giggling with more than one guy....personally...I don't how cute she is....I think the guy should draw back and really re-evaluate his feelings....

As far as what Joris said about not wanting to make the first move....let's just say I'm not shy at all. I have several guy "buds" Even so..if I developed an interest in any of them I wouldn't do or say anthing...if he never says anything I will leave it in God's hands. I don't think there is anything wrong in clueing the guy in some.....drop some hints....but first move should be made by the guy.

And yes...it's a chance. But if it's done so prayerfully God will go before you.

And even so....anyone can tell if I was ever half-interested in someone.....they deffinately get treated differantly....

There's my two cents. :)

azurity

11-26-2006, 11:34 PM

Chelles... well said. Very well said.

It's true. Everyone's "signals" are different, but there is usually a difference between the way they treat the person they are interested in and everyone else.

Some girls want you to know they are interested. Others try to hide it as much as they can.

But even if you know a girl is interested in you, it doesn't mean she is the girl for you. Be prayerful, and allow God to lead you. The same goes for the girls! Interest is definitely not an indication of the Lord's will.

vpiper

11-28-2006, 05:45 PM

I'm so glad I do NOT have to worry about this stuff. I entered the message practically engaged to a believer, yet we were just friends talking about God. I honestly don't know how you guys do it, I know so many single girls in the message and no interested men in sight.

marichino_freedom

11-28-2006, 06:18 PM

i dont worry about it either....never really have. i guess i kinda just knew when someone was interested in me.

gingersnap4jc

12-01-2006, 03:51 PM

This is funny that this conv. is on just the opposite of what I was thinking. Which was how do you know if a guy is interested in you or just being friends. In my case I once had a guy that was in the message that I thought was interested in me because of things he had said. Like saying that he was praying if I was to be his wife and flattering words. But there was never a I like you, Do you want to court or anything inbetween just that we were best friends. I thought that he was interested in me for more then just friends, but then find out that I have misread him and that he loves me like a sister. Which the part about loving me like a sister isn't bad it's just the fact that we use to talk and then he didn't seem like he even wanted to be friends. It hurt me because I felt like I was loosing my bestfriend.
I will be much carefuller from now on with what I think a guy is saying. I definatly believe that the guy should pursue the girl, it is not aprpriate for the girl to pursue the guy. He should contact her from the begining if he likes her and has prayed about it. I think that even if he wants to be just friends with her, that he being the man should make the contact to the girl. If not it puts the girl in a position she shouldn't be in and could even show forth a Jezebel and Ahab spirit.
As far as how a girl acts when she is interested in a guy. I would say that if you talk online and she says you are the only guy she talks to, take that as her being interested in you. If you talk with her and she smiles, laughs at things you say,wants to spend time with you, wants to know more about you and vice versa, she might even actually in your prescence seem a little shy or quieter then even when you talk on the phone or internet. That is all that I can think of rite now. But maybe it will help.
May our Lord Jesus Christ Bless You, Mary

vpiper

12-01-2006, 05:45 PM

Chelles

12-01-2006, 10:31 PM

Relationships.

Ugh.

Don't get me started. LOL

gingersnap4jc

12-02-2006, 12:20 AM

I think that a guy should pray about it first and not say anything about it unless God answered him yes and he really believes that she is the one, that was just not fair of him saying that to you, gingersnap4jc

Yes, I believe you are rite about that. It's very confusing when somthing like that happens. I am just trusting in the Lord and praying for His will. Because I don't want anything besides that. It was hard because I really was praying and felt that it was the Lord's will. I have been told that just because what happened happened dosn't mean that it wasn't the Lord's will to began with, but that he may of not decided to go for what the Lord had. I realised that just because that happened dosn't mean that God is going to say well that's it, you missed your chance because he decided not to do what I called him to. I am so glad that God isn't that way!
Lord Bless, Mary

Unregistered

12-02-2006, 06:40 AM

I have been told that just because what happened happened dosn't mean that it wasn't the Lord's will to began with, but that he may of not decided to go for what the Lord had.well I don't think it's His will, Him knowing the guy isn't ready yet/doesn't feel ready yet, or so... you see? He knows that. Relax, you didn't loose out "your only chance". If there were something like that, it'd be you choosing against it, not someone else (though I don't think Lord gives "only one chance", He's much too gracefull for that)

Unregistered

12-27-2006, 07:06 PM

How do you guys tell us girls that you like us??

joris

12-28-2006, 06:52 AM

How do you guys tell us girls that you like us??last time I did, two years ago, I sorta just told - but that was like that as I already knew she didn't feel anything like that to me.

This time... I just haven't said anything to her, or to friends. If someone knows, it's by seeing something about me, not by me telling, and... well that's possible, just can't see that

marichino_freedom

12-28-2006, 12:41 PM

in high school, i was terrible! if i liked someone, i was just like: "whats up, your cute, i like you, lets go out." i am a very foward person, possibly a little too foward sometimes.

but, i guess i really havent had to worry about being like that since i graduated.......hmmmmm.

Unregistered

12-28-2006, 01:13 PM

How do you guys tell us girls that you like us??
I don't. I first learn as much as I can about the girl. Then (and at this point this what I am planning on doing) is to talk to her father about my interest and heed his advice. If he wants me to tell her I will. If he wants to tell her then that is fine. I think it's better a girl finds out one of these ways (instead of through the grapevine or just by speculation). Of course I'm pretty top secret about things though. I'm sure others are different.

vpiper

12-28-2006, 06:22 PM

marichino_freedom

12-29-2006, 12:46 PM

well, you know i dont! i started hanging out with seth before i started college. so, no, i dont. havent needed to :D

plus, i'm very different since i graduated.

vpiper

12-31-2006, 06:31 PM

what I was trying to say is that if you get thrown back out into the dating world you are not even going to be looking for a guy who was a girl who will throw herself at him like that.

you will talk to guys like they are people and let him prosue the relationship, or am I wrong?

If a girl doesn't talk to a guy there are one of two main reasons, she doesn't know/like him enough to spend time talking to him or she likes him and is too shy to talk to him.

I'm sure guys are the same way. . . are they?

joris

12-31-2006, 06:46 PM

I'm sure guys are the same way. . . are they?yeah...........................

God'schild

12-31-2006, 07:41 PM

It's in the eyes of the person if they like someone whenever they are around that person you can see it in their eyes.

EllyMae

12-31-2006, 08:21 PM

It's in the eyes of the person if they like someone whenever they are around that person you can see it in their eyes.

That sure does sound pretty... but can't say I believe it. :D

God'schild

12-31-2006, 08:33 PM

That sure does sound pretty... but can't say I believe it. :D

EllyMae do you know how to read people's eyes??
i used to take drama in public school. your eyes will even give away how your feeling. only people that know you well will be able to read your eyes.

it's okay if you believe that or not. it doesn't bother me.

EllyMae

12-31-2006, 08:41 PM

EllyMae do you know how to read people's eyes??
i used to take drama in public school. your eyes will even give away how your feeling. only people that know you well will be able to read your eyes.

it's okay if you believe that or not. it doesn't bother me.

Haha, I was kidding. I'm sure there is truth to that. :)

My face has a personality of it's own. Sometimes I can give people funny looks without even trying. Maybe that's why I find that hard to believe. :D

God'schild

12-31-2006, 09:00 PM

My face has a personality of it's own. Sometimes I can give people funny looks without even trying. Maybe that's why I find that hard to believe. :D

I know what you mean.. people say that i can drive people away with the way i look at them, without me knowing it. I can look into people's eyes untill they have to look away and i don't even know i'm doing it.

vpiper

01-03-2007, 02:41 PM

I think the people not involved can read eyes better, cause they have nothing to loose.

joris

01-03-2007, 02:50 PM

I think the people not involved can read eyes better, cause they have nothing to loose.I have no clue about reading eyes... :sad:

Skirty

01-03-2007, 04:26 PM

I have no clue about reading eyes... :sad:
I wouldn't worry about it :)
Something like 'reading' eyes is a little risky when it comes to relationships in my opinion. Way to easy to misinterpret.

marichino_freedom

01-03-2007, 05:02 PM

it can get messy, thats for sure

vpiper

01-03-2007, 05:16 PM

yeah I would stay out of it, but sometimes I can tell some one likes the other person, but unless we are good friends I keep my mouth shut.

Babyruth

01-03-2007, 07:08 PM

I wouldn't worry about it :)
Something like 'reading' eyes is a little risky when it comes to relationships in my opinion. Way to easy to misinterpret.
Yeah, people get really messed up trying to "read someone's eyes." Kind of silly to me.

QuirkyKid16

01-04-2007, 07:50 PM

Someone tried to do it to me, all it did was creep me right out.

Skirty

01-04-2007, 07:52 PM

I know of a few girls in our church, well guys too actually, that thought the 'look' someone had in their eyes meant something. Every time it was a misunderstanding and people ended up embarrased and hurt.

EllyMae

01-04-2007, 09:07 PM

God'schild

01-04-2007, 09:36 PM

"Reading people's eyes" sounds kind of odd to me.

I think reading people's facial expressions would work a lot better, which comes from a lot more than just the eyes.

However, even then it's very easy to misunderstand someone, so there's no way I would base a decision on that alone. Haha...

It's hard to read people's facial expression if you don't know how to read the eyes. because some/most people are very good from keeping their feelings show on their face. your eyes give you away.

that's what i think anyways.

HotShot53

01-04-2007, 11:32 PM

Skirty

01-05-2007, 12:04 AM

lol, I would just leave 'reading' people alone all together.
I've had enough people who thought they could 'read' me make complete idiots of themselves, honestly.
I am an extremely private person about feelings and all that, and I make it a point to not let them show.
I've had people think I was mad at them, in love with them, jealous of them, turning my back on God because of the look I had in church... It's just silly in my opinion.
Now, I am not saying it can't be done or anything like that, but with something so unreliable, I just think it's too risky to be basing something like a relationship on.

HotShot53

01-05-2007, 12:51 AM

Now, I am not saying it can't be done or anything like that, but with something so unreliable, I just think it's too risky to be basing something like a relationship on.

Lol, I agree completely.

AlanaH

01-05-2007, 02:27 AM

Me too...although I am a very read-able person, only certain people can do it accurately. The rest make complete fools of themselves.

countrygurl

01-05-2007, 05:32 PM

I agree with Skirty..

AlanaH

01-05-2007, 11:36 PM

I laugh when I think of what some people have assumed. It's like, "Riiiiiight..."

gingersnap4jc

01-06-2007, 12:22 AM

Lol, we had an interesting conv at WYR about the topic of eyes, and what color eyes are the most readable... I still don't think any eyes are very readable, it's the whole face that is readable to me ;)

LOL Yes that was quite a conversation! I can't say that I agree with that theory either. I think more then anything what you should look for in a person is there character and are they showing forth the fruits of the spirit. It isn't the looks of a person that tells you who they are or even their eyes it's there heart that should make an impresion on you. Do they love God, and what is there relationship with Him?
Ok, I just realised that I kinda got off subject but anyways................
Lord Bless you all, Mary

AlanaH

01-06-2007, 05:06 PM

That's ok, it's a good response!

tadi

01-11-2007, 03:33 AM

funny!thrws glances at the guy
talks abt the guy al the tym, lyk hey did u see the kinda shoes he wore, werent they cute,hmm the song leadin', voice,
comments +vly abt the guy

BroTrevor

01-11-2007, 10:34 AM

comments +vly abt the guy

addvoly?
plusvely?

what is +vly

This one isn't in my chat speak vocab.

countrygurl

01-11-2007, 04:16 PM

positively, I think is what it supposed to say...

blessed

01-11-2007, 04:17 PM

WOW!!!!! country girl is good....

countrygurl

01-11-2007, 04:19 PM

Thank you, Blessed.:D

BroTrevor

01-11-2007, 05:23 PM

oh man... I get it now!

marichino_freedom

01-11-2007, 05:26 PM

couldve been "evily", too.....:shuriken:

countrygurl

01-11-2007, 06:46 PM

lol!! Yeah, but positively makes more sense there..:D

HotShot53

01-11-2007, 06:50 PM

she definately meant positively.... though none of us would have figured that out without countrygurl's help ;)

joris

01-12-2007, 06:46 AM

positively, I think is what it supposed to say...you're smart, I couldn't have figured that one out either

something tells me that +ly got this thread offtopic ;)

countrygurl

01-12-2007, 03:45 PM

Thank you, Joris....That made me feel very good!!!:D

Yes, It did get us off topic though!!

Where were we? LOL

joris

01-12-2007, 06:19 PM

I think the thing was you girls were supposed to help us guys out :D ;)
now tell that around, spread that, untill all girls know that, to make it not too hard... :D

Nate

01-12-2007, 06:35 PM

Does she use a cell phone to type, or does she just like making me go blind at an early age? All that squinting and riddle speak... It's like translating chinjaspanglish.

HotShot53

01-12-2007, 09:56 PM

Does she use a cell phone to type, or does she just like making me go blind at an early age? All that squinting and riddle speak... It's like translating chinjaspanglish.

She said in her intro thread that she uses a computer (cause I asked), and I think she's gotten the hint that most of us here don't read fluent chat speak... her last few posts have been written in normal english :)

AlanaH

01-12-2007, 11:43 PM

I'm afraid that I don't read one shred of chat speak. I'm slow when it comes to these types of things.

Nate

01-13-2007, 01:38 AM

She said in her intro thread that she uses a computer (cause I asked), and I think she's gotten the hint that most of us here don't read fluent chat speak... her last few posts have been written in normal english :)

s\/\/33t! Th3|23's 0n|_y s000 m|_|c|-| n0n3ng|_1s|-| 4 d00d c4n t4k3 b4 |-|3 |_00s3s |-|1s c00|_...

marichino_freedom

01-13-2007, 01:05 PM

I'm afraid that I don't read one shred of chat speak. I'm slow when it comes to these types of things.

same here.

nate, that made my brain hurt! i deciphered like, 3 words: sweet, dude, cool.

joris

01-13-2007, 01:21 PM

s\/\/33t! Th3|23's 0n|_y s000 m|_|c|-| n0n3ng|_1s|-| 4 d00d c4n t4k3 b4 |-|3 |_00s3s |-|1s c00|_...
"sweet! There's only sooo much nonenglish for a dude can take before he looses his cool ..."

BroTrevor

01-13-2007, 02:32 PM

I got "sweet there's only so much..." before I had a total shutdown of cognitive abilities...

EllyMae

01-13-2007, 02:50 PM

s\/\/33t! Th3|23's 0n|_y s000 m|_|c|-| n0n3ng|_1s|-| 4 d00d c4n t4k3 b4 |-|3 |_00s3s |-|1s c00|_...

Nate, you have too much time on your hands...

Nate

01-13-2007, 03:07 PM

Nate, you have too much time on your hands...
17 d1dn'7 74k3 7|-|47 |_0|\|g 2 \/\/|2173 0|_|7...

leahmb

01-13-2007, 03:45 PM

17 d1dn'7 74k3 7|-|47 |_0|\|g 2 \/\/|2173 0|_|7...

It didn't actually take that long?

AlanaH

01-13-2007, 05:38 PM

My brain is now completely fried. Thanks, Nate. :D

marichino_freedom

01-14-2007, 05:40 AM

"sweet! There's only sooo much nonenglish for a dude can take before he looses his cool ..."

i say "whoa".

that is scary :D

AlanaH

01-14-2007, 11:49 AM

17 d1dn'7 74k3 7|-|47 |_0|\|g 2 \/\/|2173 0|_|7...

I don't know what the last ones are....

EllyMae

01-14-2007, 02:24 PM

17 d1dn'7 74k3 7|-|47 |_0|\|g 2 \/\/|2173 0|_|7...

You must have had some practice before then. :D

Noe

01-14-2007, 06:59 PM

17 d1dn'7 74k3 7|-|47 |_0|\|g 2 \/\/|2173 0|_|7...

"it didn't take that long to work out..."

am i right??

BTW joris i would have never worked out the last one if i hadn't seen your post:)

HotShot53

01-15-2007, 01:24 AM

"it didn't take that long to work out..."

am i right??

yep, I figured it all, but "out".... looks like online graphiti to me ;)

Nate

01-15-2007, 02:03 AM

"it didn't take that long to write out..."

AlanaH

01-15-2007, 03:45 AM

I finally figured out the "write", but the "out" had me looped. :)

Noe

01-15-2007, 08:56 AM

aahh i see. i thought 'work' didn't look quite right.

joris

01-15-2007, 11:06 AM

"it didn't take that long to write out..."right... that one was even worse ;)

marichino_freedom

01-15-2007, 02:27 PM

moving on............ :D

AlanaH

01-15-2007, 06:05 PM

What were we talking about again??? :)

HotShot53

01-15-2007, 10:31 PM

What were we talking about again??? :)

how you girls are supposed to leave us all kinds of clues, so we know when you like us....

AlanaH

01-15-2007, 10:44 PM

Oh yeah. Like I would ever really do that though. :)

joris

01-16-2007, 07:09 AM

Oh yeah. Like I would ever really do that though. :)then don't complain so many girls (message girls) stay single, if they're working the hardest to make it the hardest to come towards them... ;)

God'schild

01-16-2007, 09:08 PM

Most guys like girls that "play hard to get". (at least all the guys i know)

JoeC

01-16-2007, 10:25 PM

That's a myth. Granted, we don't want a girl to throw themselves at us... but if a guy were to make himself vulnerable by hinting at his interest, it would be a mistake to play with a guy's mind at that point. Love's a tender thing... if you're interested in the guy as well you should give some hope... hence the girls that are still single at thirty (though I'm sure there are other reasons as well).

HotShot53

01-16-2007, 11:44 PM

I kind of agree with Joe... hard to get might work sometimes, but it probably works a lot better after the guy is already half swooning, and won't leave no matter what ;) Actually, it probably works better in the world than it does among real Christians... cause in the world, the guy can take it as a challenge, and doesn't have to have any intention about getting married, winning the girl is all they care about. Christians, however, do it with a purpose towards marriage... so it's a lot less likely for you to go try to woo someone who's giving you the cold shoulder.

blessed

01-17-2007, 09:21 AM

Love's a tender thing... if you're interested in the guy as well you should give some hope... hence the girls that are still single at thirty (though I'm sure there are other reasons as well).

I am sure there are other reasons!!! ALot of guys who live with their Mom are afraid of the responsibility and are not even looking..

BroTrevor

01-17-2007, 10:45 AM

ooooh....

<sticks finger in air and checks tension level>

this thread could get interesting...

<grabs chair and popcorn>

pray continue!

vpiper

01-17-2007, 11:41 AM

I am sure there are other reasons!!! ALot of guys who live with their Mom are afraid of the responsibility and are not even looking..

My Hubby and I had this debate since he and his brother's all lived at home until marriage.

I believed that guys should move out and learn to take care of themselves before they take the responsibility of another.

My husband believes that if the guy lives in a Godly house hold he should remain to receive guidance from the head of the household and this will also keep him from straying from the Lord.

EllyMae

01-17-2007, 02:16 PM

My Hubby and I had this debate since he and his brother's all lived at home until marriage.

I believed that guys should move out and learn to take care of themselves before they take the responsibility of another.

My husband believes that if the guy lives in a Godly house hold he should remain to receive guidance from the head of the household and this will also keep him from straying from the Lord.

I can agree with both sides, but I'm leaning more towards yours vpiper. Life is completely different from living with your parents to living on your own, and it would be nice for guys to have some experience before they start a family of their own. There's nothing wrong with wanting to live at home, especially in a Godly atmosphere, but I don't think that's a good enough excuse to stay home until you're 30. :D If someone was going to stray from the Lord, more than likely it would happen anyways.

HotShot53

01-17-2007, 03:14 PM

Unless I find some really good reason to move out, I don't think it's really necessary to live on your own... it's a lot more expensive (money wasting), and you have to cook for yourself (time wasting).... so I figure I might as well save up my money now, till I can move somewhere that comes with a live-in cook ;)

(as a side note... my Uncle is still single and living at home... and he's like in his early 50's ;) I don't plan to be at home that long...)

AlanaH

01-17-2007, 03:29 PM

I think it all boils down to what your revelation is to do. I know plenty of guys that are in their mid-late twenties, and they're still at home, but I also know of a guy that bought a house when he was 20, sold it, made a heap of money and bought some others to use as rentals.
So I guess it all depends for a guy. Now, I can't exactly say that I feel the same for a girl. To me, a girl should stay home until she's married, or if she doesn't get married, like 30 or 35...:)
My parents have told me that for years, that I can stay home until I'm either married or I turn 30, whichever happens first. So I feel relatively secure, but I just have to wait for God's will on the matter.

blessed

01-17-2007, 03:30 PM

till I can move somewhere that comes with a live-in cook ;)

(as a side note... my Uncle is still single and living at home... and he's like in his early 50's ;) I don't plan to be at home that long...)

If u keep referring to your future wife as a live-in cook you will end up like your uncle :D

joris

01-17-2007, 03:31 PM

I am sure there are other reasons!!! ALot of guys who live with their Mom are afraid of the responsibility and are not even looking..for me, "responsibility" isn't the main reason for not looking, but it's part of things ;)

EllyMae

01-17-2007, 03:33 PM

If u keep referring to your future wife as a live-in cook you will end up like your uncle :D

Ha Ha, blessed! :)

EllyMae

01-17-2007, 03:45 PM

I agree with Alana, this situation is going to be different for each person, whatever the person feels led to do.

But, I feel people take the easy way out too much.

Skirty

01-17-2007, 04:09 PM

I agree that it depends on the person... but, if either a guy or a girl is single and still living at home, I say time to start moving on. Especially for a guy.
When I hit 25, I am GONE!! mwa ha ha.... lol.
I would have been already, but I decided it was silly to rent, when I could save up for the next 4 years and have a down payment.

HotShot53

01-17-2007, 04:21 PM

Skirty

01-17-2007, 04:23 PM

And what's wrong with saving up even longer, and having an even bigger down payment? ;)
Because I don't want to be living off my parents til kingdom come. :)
What's wrong with being on you'r own and supporting yourself?

HotShot53

01-17-2007, 04:26 PM

Because I don't want to be living off my parents til kingdom come. :)
What's wrong with being on you'r own and supporting yourself?

I already gave my reasons... a lot more expensive and time consuming ;) And what's so wrong with living with your parents till your prince comes with your kingdom?

EllyMae

01-17-2007, 04:53 PM

I already gave my reasons... a lot more expensive and time consuming ;)

He's proving my point... :D

That would be the easiest thing to do, but I think the experience would be well worth it.

BroTrevor

01-17-2007, 04:55 PM

He's proving my point... :D

That would be the easiest thing to do, but I think the experience would be well worth it.

For the guy, if the financial difference meant an apartment for 5 years because he was barely on his feet, vs. banking that money for 5 years and starting out in a house, I think that staying at home was wise.

If he's just blowing it all anyhow, then I recommend getting a house and figuring out what real life, and real bills are like.

It all depends on the person.

blessed

01-17-2007, 04:56 PM

Sometimes I do think I would prefer a guy who lives on his own for a while ... but as Bro T said it depens on the person and the situation. Most guys I know who lives with mama does nothing and just blow away their money on clothes,car and car and car

leahmb

01-17-2007, 05:03 PM

Most guys I know who lives with mama does nothing and just blow away their money on clothes,car and car and car

Preach it sista'!!!!!!!!!!!

I already gave my reasons... a lot more expensive and time consuming ;) And what's so wrong with living with your parents till your prince comes with your kingdom?

It's this weird thing called character development...........

EllyMae

01-17-2007, 05:08 PM

For the guy, if the financial difference meant an apartment for 5 years because he was barely on his feet, vs. banking that money for 5 years and starting out in a house, I think that staying at home was wise.

If he's just blowing it all anyhow, then I recommend getting a house and figuring out what real life, and real bills are like.

It all depends on the person.

I agree, it does depend on the person and where they are financially. But as blessed said, most of the guys I know still living at home, are barely saving, but rather spending most of it.

HotShot, I don't think you would have a problem renting your own apartment. ;) But, I'm sure you're one of the guys who are responsible with their money.

vpiper

01-17-2007, 05:26 PM

Because I don't want to be living off my parents til kingdom come. :)
What's wrong with being on you'r own and supporting yourself?

Living with your parent's doesn't need to be living off your parents, Adults who live together should help out with everything. living at home doesn't mean you can't buy groceries or pay an electric bill. But becoming an adult should mean learning to be responsible for money and not blowing it on clothes and cars.

I currently agree with both sides on some points. I know a guy who would have fallen off the deep end if it wasn't for his parents.

NoahL

01-17-2007, 05:34 PM

It's this weird thing called character development...........

Right. Because we all know it's impossible to develop character while living with your parents....

Umm... wait a second.... :confused:

BroTrevor

01-17-2007, 05:35 PM

Right. Because we all know it's impossible to develop character while living with your parents....

Umm... wait a second.... :confused:

Heh heh

exactly!!!

I bet some people develop MORE character staying with their parents...

but I guess that depends on your parents...

Skirty

01-17-2007, 05:38 PM

I guess it all boils down to what your home life is like. If you have the kind of parents who financially support you, make you breakfast every morning, and send you notes in your lunch box, you aren't doing much 'developing'.

If you're in a more independant environment, then all the power to you.

I don't want to get married til I've been on my own, or marry someone who hasn't been on their own. Just a personal thing.

HotShot53

01-17-2007, 06:09 PM

I agree, it does depend on the person and where they are financially. But as blessed said, most of the guys I know still living at home, are barely saving, but rather spending most of it.

HotShot, I don't think you would have a problem renting your own apartment. ;) But, I'm sure you're one of the guys who are responsible with their money.
I don't spend much of it at all... I grew up without much money laying around, so I kind of learned how to not spend a ton ;) I could buy a house right now, without any problems... but I see no need to waste the money and time that it would take, all just so I can prove I can live by myself... as has been said, everyone is different, don't think just cause someone is living at home it's cause they have to and can't take care of themselves ;)

vpiper

01-17-2007, 06:14 PM

so is the traveling you are talking about so you can find your "live in cook" so you can buy that house?

HotShot53

01-17-2007, 06:19 PM

so is the traveling you are talking about so you can find your "live in cook" so you can buy that house?

Lol, not really... I plan to continue to travel even after I find whomever it is ;) Of course, if I happen to meet them during the course of my travels, I won't complain too much....

Skirty

01-17-2007, 06:20 PM

I'd really like to meet a girl who doesn't mind being referred to as a 'live-in-cook'.

HotShot53

01-17-2007, 06:22 PM

I'd really like to meet a girl who doesn't mind being referred to as a 'live-in-cook'.

Don't worry, when I find her, I'll introduce you ;)

Noe

01-17-2007, 06:40 PM

Genesis 2:24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.

My mom has quote that scripture hundreds of times to us. she didn't and still doesn't approve of one of my bro moving out. He lives on his own at the moment and he still hasn't learnt to be responsible.

So i'm stuck untill someone rescues me.:box: lol :)

leahmb

01-17-2007, 06:42 PM

Don't worry, when I find her, I'll introduce you ;)

Hmmmm....we might be waiting a while :)

HotShot53

01-17-2007, 07:27 PM

Hmmmm....we might be waiting a while :)

I never said you wouldn't be waiting a while ;) But if it's the right person, it'll be worth the wait, I assume... I just wish I knew who and how long, now ;)

AlanaH

01-17-2007, 07:43 PM

If u keep referring to your future wife as a live-in cook you will end up like your uncle :D

That's pretty much what I was thinking too!!!
I think it'd be funny if his future wife doesn't even know how to boil water. :D

joris

01-17-2007, 08:31 PM

So i'm stuck untill someone rescues me.:box: lol :)one might take that as an invitation to pretty please get married to you ... ;)

Noe

01-17-2007, 09:01 PM

Nate

01-17-2007, 10:04 PM

i was saying i don't have any choice but to stay put no matter what age i am as my parents don't like the idea of me moving out till i'm married (or any of my siblings).
any ways it would be pretty boring living alone and who would get rid of the bugs for me if i'm alone :peep:.

They probably just want someone to take care of them in their old age :P

No, but really. It all depends on the person. Some people need to be on their own. Paul said that he would that we all stay single, but would you expect everyone to stay at home with their parrents? I mean, if by 25 you're still unmarried, and I'm not picking on you DJ, isn't it about time you lived on your own anyway? A man or woman who is 25 isn't a child anymore. If they aren't responsible enough to be on their own by then, then it's really the parrent's fault. Part of being an adult is making your own choices, and not having to check with mom and pop.

HotShot53

01-17-2007, 10:07 PM

They probably just want someone to take care of them in their old age :P

No, but really. It all depends on the person. Some people need to be on their own. Paul said that he would that we all stay single, but would you expect everyone to stay at home with their parrents? I mean, if by 25 you're still unmarried, and I'm not picking on you DJ, isn't it about time you lived on your own anyway? A man or woman who is 25 isn't a child anymore. If they aren't responsible enough to be on their own by then, then it's really the parrent's fault. Part of being an adult is making your own choices, and not having to check with mom and pop.

Just cause you are responsible enough to be on your own, do you really need to move out to prove it? There are plenty of people living on their own, who are far from responsible...

Nate

01-17-2007, 10:24 PM

Just cause you are responsible enough to be on your own, do you really need to move out to prove it? There are plenty of people living on their own, who are far from responsible...

It's not about proving anything. It's about being your own person.

HotShot53

01-17-2007, 10:28 PM

It's not about proving anything. It's about being your own person.
And why can't you be your own person while at home? Moving out just cause everyone else does seems to be just following the crowd ;)

Nate

01-18-2007, 02:54 AM

And why can't you be your own person while at home? Moving out just cause everyone else does seems to be just following the crowd ;)

Whatever. I already said I wasn't picking on you, and I already said it's different for everyone. If you want to argue that your way is right, through and through, and that people shouldn't move out on their own untill they're married, I'm not even going to bother. It's honestly not worth the time.
If you want to stay with your mom and dad the rest of your life or until you get hitched, that's fine. It's your life. Live it the way you think best serves God.

Babyruth

01-18-2007, 03:52 AM

They probably just want someone to take care of them in their old age :P

No, but really. It all depends on the person. Some people need to be on their own. Paul said that he would that we all stay single, but would you expect everyone to stay at home with their parrents? I mean, if by 25 you're still unmarried, and I'm not picking on you DJ, isn't it about time you lived on your own anyway? A man or woman who is 25 isn't a child anymore. If they aren't responsible enough to be on their own by then, then it's really the parrent's fault. Part of being an adult is making your own choices, and not having to check with mom and pop.
Aaah yes, our dear Brother Paul. What a wise man. Such words of wisdom he spoke. Words that should be listened to. I have taken him as my example.

marichino_freedom

01-18-2007, 04:26 AM

my dad kicked me out after i graduated high school....like a month after. i ended up living with my mom that summer. then i tried living on "my own"....but i was with 3 total strangers in the dorms and HATED IT! granted, it didnt help that they were three party girls, but i ended up moving my stuff out into my moms apt. out of the blue one day. i'm still there, but i'm rarely home......so basically, i sleep there :)

vpiper

01-18-2007, 12:56 PM

everyone has a different situation so basically it should be between you, God and your Parents.

JoeC

01-18-2007, 01:25 PM

Actually, it probably works better in the world than it does among real Christians... cause in the world, the guy can take it as a challenge, and doesn't have to have any intention about getting married, winning the girl is all they care about. Christians, however, do it with a purpose towards marriage... so it's a lot less likely for you to go try to woo someone who's giving you the cold shoulder.

BOOM!

okay, so I'm a little slow in replying to posts these days... a beg your pardons.

I'm convinced DJ hit the nail on the head here. Playing "hard to get" isn't the kind of attitude that someone serious about marriage would take, unless they're taking the world as an example.

Playing with people's emotions that way is

1) Treating courtship like a game

2) Self-serving

It's a concept from the world. Anyone disagree?

Nate

01-18-2007, 01:43 PM

It's a concept from the world. Anyone disagree?

No, but I could if you wanted me to? :P

BroTrevor

01-18-2007, 01:45 PM

It's a concept from the world. Anyone disagree?

Awful quiet in here....

HotShot53

01-18-2007, 02:44 PM

Whatever. I already said I wasn't picking on you, and I already said it's different for everyone. If you want to argue that your way is right, through and through, and that people shouldn't move out on their own untill they're married, I'm not even going to bother. It's honestly not worth the time.
If you want to stay with your mom and dad the rest of your life or until you get hitched, that's fine. It's your life. Live it the way you think best serves God.

I wasn't trying to say everyone should stay at home... I was just trying to say that moving out at 25 isn't the only good option. So I think we're in agreement... there is no one-size-fits-all answer ;)