Age differences between husband and wife

[cabletown]

What do you think are the acceptable limits of age differences between a husband and wife? Should the guy always be older? How much older/younger could a guy/girl be?

[JoeC]

I think what is "acceptable" is mostly culturally defined. I heard Brother Branham thought an acceptable age for a guy to marry was 25, and 18 for the girl. This implies that 7 years isn't too much a spread.

Practically speaking, it's whatever the age of the man and woman who God brings together are when they are ready to provide financially, domestically, and spiritually in their roles. Also, it's probably wise that they marry closely enough in age that they'll be able to relate to each other's season of life. Maturity also being a major consideration.

I don't see any reason for setting a certain number of years difference that should exist between a man and woman, or who should be the older one. It entirely depends on the couple.

[Philippe]

Well, It depends on the actual ages of both of them and also the ages they look.

I would say that if the boy look more like the father of the girl than her husband, then the difference is too much...

I would also think that the importance is somehow less important if the girl is at least 20 years old... when she get married.

In the other direction, I would say that it somehow more important that the girl not be much older than the boy...

[BroTrevor]

I don't see any reason for setting a certain number of years difference that should exist between a man and woman, or who should be the older one. It entirely depends on the couple.

<gasp>

What will the legalists do??

[SisTrev]

it all boils down to the maturity of the indivdual. My parents are 10 years apart. But they were older when the got married ...23 and 33... If they had been 18 and 28 or 16 and 26 I think it would have been different.

Trevor and I are 1 year and a few months apart...(him being the younger one). But no one ever guesses that. He seems a lot older then he actually is.

Brother Branham's second wife was 10 years younger then he was and he talks very highly of her.

So as i said before...i believe it depends on each person's maturity level when they marry.

[eagleendtime]

BELIEVEST.THOU.THIS_ MINNEAPOLIS.MN SUNDAY_ 50-0716
E-38 All right. Here she was going down, probably, to get some water. Let's dramatize it just a minute so the little fellows can pick it up. Maybe she's going down to get some water.
In the Oriental type, they packed it on their head, big old pitcher with the wings out on the side here, handles.
And I can see little Mary, about seventeen years old, engaged to a man about forty-five, some children. Here she come up along. But she was righteous in her heart, because Joseph was a just man before God.
Feel a lot better if women--young ladies today picked something like that today, instead of some little boy with a pack of cigarettes in his pocket.

GOD'S.GIFTS.ALWAYS.FIND.THEIR.PLACES_ JEFF.IN V-6 N-13 SUNDAY_ 63-1222
39 Joseph couldn't understand it, it was too unusual. He was a good man, nothing wrong with him. He was a good man, a just man, but it was so unusual. See, Joseph probably forty years old or forty-five, something like that, they claim, when he and Mary was engaged. But here we find something that never had happened: a woman espoused to this man and yet be found to be mother. And it was so unusual Joseph was minded to put her away. But right at that crucial moment, God sent His Angel, and appeared to him in a dream and said, "Don't fear to take to thee Mary thy wife, for that which is conceived in her is of the Holy Ghost."
What a newborn faith Joseph must've had when he rose up from there. See, he never had need of any interpretation, the dream wasn't in symbols. It was right straight out, "Don't fear to take Mary thy wife, for that which is conceived in her is of the Holy Ghost." There was no prophet to give the interpretation, so it had to come directly, right straight like that to God--from God to Joseph. Now... And God taken that secondarily way.


45 to 17 hmm let's see that's 28 years. Mary was probably mature enought for it. Fact of the matter, I think in certain countries where the hardships are there, young people grow up quicker, are ready to take on life's responsibliities.

[Babyruth]

That would be scary, that's all I have to say on the matter. Ok, one more thing, you'd have to either pay me big time or God would have to do some major revelations in my heart for me to marry someone that old. Nowadays, at least, it's kind of disturbing.

[Noe]

i know some one who's daughter was about 17 when she married and the guy was 35 and someone else i know is 9 or 10 years older than her husband. i wouldn't like to be in either situation. i think it depends on the people if their comfortable with it then others will just have to accept it.

[eagleendtime]

I know of several couples in the message that have large age spreads.

One with about better than 25 years Husband to wife, and going the other way 10 for wife to husband.

To me, if love is involved and God is behind it, I would be daresn't to say anything against it. Fact of the matter I would back it in prayer for that couple.

[AgapZoe]

it all boils down to the maturity of the indivdual. My parents are 10 years apart. But they were older when the got married ...23 and 33... If they had been 18 and 28 or 16 and 26 I think it would have been different.

Trevor and I are 1 year and a few months apart...(him being the younger one). But no one ever guesses that. He seems a lot older then he actually is.

Brother Branham's second wife was 10 years younger then he was and he talks very highly of her.

So as i said before...i believe it depends on each person's maturity level when they marry.

I concur with sis Trev on this one and some of you too..

I want to bring in this aspect of History repeating itself: E.g my mum and dad got married when my mum was 18 and my dad 28! ofcourse God knows the desires of my heart and He knows what's best for me,right! As for me,I get along well with people 5-10 ,i.e brothers,older than myself esp 7-9 years difference! I pray that God wil give me a bro who's atleast older than me,or even if not chronologically older than me,maturewise older than me! I know myself too well,if I get an equal or someone younger than me,maturity or chronologically,I'll look down upon them and I'll need God's Grace to live with that particular person for the rest of my life,till death do us part! *woh*

[jtucker]

<gasp>

What will the legalists do??

LOL this was great!

I see nothing Wrong with age differences as long as God directs it by his Will, What God hath joined let no man seperate

[HotShot53]

That would be scary, that's all I have to say on the matter. Ok, one more thing, you'd have to either pay me big time or God would have to do some major revelations in my heart for me to marry someone that old. Nowadays, at least, it's kind of disturbing.

Being as you've said you'd need some major revelation to get married anyway, apparently this doesn't need anything more ;)

I'd agree with everything said before me... not much more needs to be added.

[eagleendtime]

Revelation yes. That's part of the key, the other part is to wait on God. Here is my favorite Marriage and Divorce quote.

MARRIAGE.AND.DIVORCE_ JEFF.IN V-3 N-13 SUNDAY_ 65-0221M
45-2 This is an awful strong thing. I didn't know how to bring it out. What will I do when I got men and women setting in my congregation, some that's been married twice or three times? Good men, good women, all mixed up, what done it? False teaching. Exactly, not waiting on the Lord. "What God has joined together, let no man put asunder..." Not what man joined together, what God joined together.
When you got a direct revelation from God that's your wife and the same thing, that's yours the rest of your life. See? But what man joins together anybody can put apart. But what God joins together no man better dare to touch it. "Whatsoever God joins together," He said, "let no man put asunder." Not what some half-drunk magistrate, or something else put together, or some backslidden preacher with a bunch of creeds in a book that'd let them do anything in the world and the Word of God laying right there. See? I'm talking about what God joined together.


Sums it all up, and all the posts too.

[fredmaina]

i think age will really depend on many factors since we are not all the same!we just need to pray and do God's will and He will show us the way.

[AlanaH]

[quote=JoeC]I think what is "acceptable" is mostly culturally defined. I heard Brother Branham thought an acceptable age for a guy to marry was 25, and 18 for the girl. This implies that 7 years isn't too much a spread. quote]

Lol...that's sounding way too familiar to me right now...I'm 18 and...well never mind. :) Grin.

[HotShot53]

Lol...that's sounding way too familiar to me right now...I'm 18 and...well never mind. :) Grin.

You know you can't say that and stop there....

[countrygurl]

[quote=JoeC]I think what is "acceptable" is mostly culturally defined. I heard Brother Branham thought an acceptable age for a guy to marry was 25, and 18 for the girl. This implies that 7 years isn't too much a spread. quote]

Lol...that's sounding way too familiar to me right now...I'm 18 and...well never mind. :) Grin.

whoaaaaaaa... you can't just leave us hanging like that sister! the suspense is bound to kill us!! :D

[Benoni]

I wish to know if in the bible any saint ever married woman older than him..

[leahmb]

I wish to know if in the bible any saint ever married woman older than him..

Hmmm...Interesting question. I can't think of any off hand, but that's not saying much :)

[AlanaH]

whoaaaaaaa... you can't just leave us hanging like that sister! the suspense is bound to kill us!! :D

What kind of flowers do you want on your grave? Lol....all in good time folks.

[NeedGod]

I wish to know if in the bible any saint ever married woman older than him..
you may have a point, but then, we are not always told the ages of people in the bible, are we?
personally, i think it really depends. But for me, it has to be a guy who is much olderas i have not met many younger guys who are more mature than me.
I however know several sisters in church who are older but they live severely happy lives. I also know sisters who have married older guys but they are unhappy. in fact, i know happy and unhappy couples in each scenario. I believe that is why we are told to pray and let God lead us.
well, i have said my piece, Now ALANA, say your piece

[AgapZoe]

you're right cuz.

[AlanaH]

you may have a point, but then, we are not always told the ages of people in the bible, are we?
personally, i think it really depends. But for me, it has to be a guy who is much olderas i have not met many younger guys who are more mature than me.
I however know several sisters in church who are older but they live severely happy lives. I also know sisters who have married older guys but they are unhappy. in fact, i know happy and unhappy couples in each scenario. I believe that is why we are told to pray and let God lead us.
well, i have said my piece, Now ALANA, say your piece

Notta. :) Nothing to tell anymore.

[HotShot53]

Notta. :) Nothing to tell anymore.

Meaning? You wouldn't make the same comment now, or that everyone should know what you are talking about now?

[tadi]

age is just but a number its abt luv n maturity that cnts

[joris]

age is just but a number its abt luv n maturity that cntswell... uhm, ofcourse age isn't everything, but...
There's a difference between being 16 and 20 (a big one), between 20 and 25, etc. You go through different things, typically, when being 16, or when being 20 or older. That doesn't mean there couldn't be love, that doesn't mean that love couldn't be there and be there to stay, just... it can be difficult, I guess

[primy]

hey all

personally l dont think age really matters but the level of understanding u have for each other and the love u share coz if that love is of God it will see beyond age, size, height and allsorts that we human beings look for... so basically PRAY :worthy: & PRAY :worthy: for HE will show u ur other Half (RIB)

[eagleendtime]

with the above, Prayer is the key, and revelation next.

Been reading on the civil war generals, Longstreet remarried a woman age 34 and himself 76. A 42 year spread. From the accounts, she was a good wife.

[NeedGod]

I personally don't find anything strange about that. I could fall in love with someone who's 60 just as easily as i could fall in love with someone who's 27 or so. It doesn't matter really, as long as he knows God and he treats me right.

[Jezz]

I wish to know if in the bible any saint ever married woman older than him..

Well there was a man in the Corinthian church who married his own mother... but I daresay he wasn't a saint.

David and Solomon had plenty of wives, its probable that some of them were older than they were.

[AgapZoe]

"I think what is "acceptable" is mostly culturally defined. I heard Brother Branham thought an acceptable age for a guy to marry was 25, and 18 for the girl. This implies that 7 years isn't too much a spread." Said JoeC.
Lol...that's sounding way too familiar to me right now...I'm 18 and...well never mind. :) Grin.

..and now you are 19 and you have left this statement hanging till now..............? NOOO!!!

[marichino_freedom]

hmmm....haven't seen this thread in a while.....

well, i will be 23, seth will be 26....


i think thats a good spread. :)

[Nate]

Well... I'll be honest. It creeps me out to see a man old enough to be a girls dad marrying her. Any more than 10 years of separation and it weirds me out. It makes me wonder what kind of social life (or lack thereof) that guy must have, and how dependant she must be.

I guess part of it is because I find strong-willed women attractive. I know it's partly a cultural thing. I admire strength and courage in people. Please don't confuse strength and courage with risky behavior, like jumping out of airplanes or moving vehicles. I mean the strength to live one's ideals. Someone that can't be coaxed into doing something they don't want to do, and who won't shy away from something they've set their mind to.

To me, it seems like marrying someone old enough to be your father shows a lack in personal responsibility, and a lack in self esteem. Both traits are turn-offs for me.

However, I respect other peoples decisions, and I can't judge anybody who's actually in love with someone much older or much younger than themselves. It's none of my business what other people do, and I won't start making it my business. Just thought I'd answer the question as completely as I could.

[NeedGod]

Of course much younger wives in the bible was common. Lots of people in my country marry much younger wives. Its not a tradition but it happens. I don't find it strange or out of place or even a sign of weakness. Some do in for financial reasons of course which is wrong, but for the right reason, love always makes one weak but in that weakness is a strength. No weakness in someone who marries someone much older, ignoring society, and obeying the call of love.
About women marrying younger men, if they're happy, they're happy!

[NeedGod]

Did y'all know Boaz was old enough to be Ruth's father? Our pastor told us that according to Jewish records, Boaz had loved Naomi before but Naomi hadn't loved him back but had married someone else... So he was old enough to be Ruth's father... Interesting huh? Not gross at all heh?

[Nate]

To clarify, I never said large age gaps in a marraige was gross. I said I thought it was weird.

[AgapZoe]

O sure I got you right there Nate, 'was a bit mixed up with Nam's qtn if 'it's gross'? Maybe she was in a rush, or smth...don't think she meant it that way tho'.
O yea, a large age gap is wierd, I too consider it a bit (whooo) y'know! esp if a lady is more than 10 yrs younger or the guy is like more than 3 years younger than the lady....just my take, but hey, if am a Rib to such, love will definitely overlook all that. ;-)

[eagleendtime]

BELIEVEST.THOU.THIS_ MINNEAPOLIS.MN SUNDAY_ 50-0716

And I can see little Mary, about seventeen years old, engaged to a man about forty-five, some children. Here she come up along. But she was righteous in her heart, because Joseph was a just man before God.

[eagleendtime]

GOD'S.GIFTS.ALWAYS.FIND.THEIR.PLACES_ JEFF.IN V-6 N-13 SUNDAY_ 63-1222
39 Joseph couldn't understand it, it was too unusual. He was a good man, nothing wrong with him. He was a good man, a just man, but it was so unusual. See, Joseph probably forty years old or forty-five, something like that, they claim, when he and Mary was engaged.

[eagleendtime]

GOD.HATH.A.PROVIDED.WAY_ JEFF.IN SUNDAY_ 56-0108

Maybe today you say, "Brother Branham, I'm a Christian, how did this thing come to me? Why did I get in this kind of a state?" Well, maybe, God did it just like He did to Abraham and Sarah. Why, Sarah was married probably to Abraham when she was just a teen age girl, Abraham probably a young man in his twenties. There's ten years difference in their age, maybe, her sixteen and him twenty-six.

[eagleendtime]

JEHOVAH.JIREH_ OAKLAND.CA TUESDAY_ 57-0326
E-27 Now, notice, Abraham was just an ordinary man. And God by election called him, and said, "Abraham." And notice, and this is a lot of encouragement for we older people. Abraham was seventy-five years old before God ever called him. And his wife, Sarah, was sixty-five years old. And they'd been married since they were young, perhaps, let's say Sarah being sixteen and--and Abraham twenty-six. And when they were married, they'd lived as husband and wife all this time, and she was barren. She had no children. And perhaps Abraham might've been sterile.

[eagleendtime]

age difference between Bro. Branham and Meda

She--she has stood by me, though, like a real, real chum. And Billy, when his mother died, I was about twenty-five, twenty-six years old. And he had no mother, crying, and no one to take him to. And she was just a little girl, like, then--about seventeen, eighteen. She taken care of him.

[eagleendtime]

But God also had words of comfort for the young preacher. The words were direct and specific: "You go get that Meda Broy and you marry her on October 23rd." Thus on that date in 1941, William Branham and Meda Broy were married. He was 32 years old and she was twenty-two. Billy Paul was just six years old.

[eagleendtime]

A Woman Called "Hope" http://www.biblebelievers.org/image/line_blu.gif She was the first child of Mr. and Mrs. Charles Brumback. Born on July 16, 1913, she was destined to become the wife of a young Prophet. On Friday, June 22, 1934, almost 21 years later she married William M. Branham, then, a fledgling Baptist preacher of Twenty-five. Though lacking greatly in material goods, their life together was complete and happy.

[eagleendtime]

Finally to conclude this matter.

David was very old and they did this.

I KINGS 1:2
2 Wherefore his servants said unto him, Let there be sought for my lord the king a young virgin: and let her stand before the king, and let her cherish him, and let her lie in thy bosom, that my lord the king may get heat.

I KINGS 1:3
3 So they sought for a fair damsel throughout all the coasts of Israel, and found Abishag a Shunammite, and brought her to the king.

I KINGS 1:4
4 And the damsel was very fair, and cherished the king, and ministered to him: but the king knew her not.

Abishag was considered a wife (thou David never knew her), by the actions that followed by Solomon and Adonijah.

[joris]

Believers with believers and then within your race.I know that's a sensitive subject, but just have to think about this -- in Jesus we are a new creation. Bible itself calls us a new human race. Differences like Jewish or Greek, slave or free, do not apply anymore.
Anyway, that's a different topic